Pareto Law Wilmslow footy team swashbuckle with local rivals
This week, Pareto Law’s Sporting Club Pareto played a friendly against local rivals Lagardere Sports. After a long day of recruiting, training, selling and generally putting The Pareto Effect into action, some of the team like to let their hair down by running around on a muddy field. The following is an unofficial match report from Pareto’s very own sports reporter Greg Davis.
Match Report: Sporting Club Pareto 2-3 Lagardere Sports
On Tuesday the 9th of May 2017, Sporting Club Pareto once again donned their shinpads and took to the hallowed Styal turf. What follows is a tale of intrigue, controversy and chances spurned.
During the opening exchanges, Lagardere dominated as SCP looked to develop an understanding of each other’s games. As Pareto were finding their feet, Lagardere sprang the offside trap (in what would become a recurring theme) to draw first blood. Aside from some shaky kicking early on, Chris Dowell grew into his Goalkeeping role, making some fine saves as the game progressed. One down, Pareto rallied and spent the rest of the first period encamped in Lagardere’s half. Josh Miller, Sam Graham and Ash Hunt made up an enviable attacking trio that would cause Lagardere problems throughout. The Pareto pressure paid off shortly before the interval, with Graham flicking on for Hunt to loop a header past Lagardere’s keeper, restoring parity before the half time whistle.
Mark Rothwell asking the rhetorical question ‘would anybody notice if I left?’ was a half-time highlight. After regrouping during a short break, it was time for the second half.
An untimely gust of wind sadly brought an end to Curtis Evans’ evening early in the half, which was a shame as he had forged a solid partnership with Nick Hearn until then. Sam Wates stepped in to ably deputise. Pareto were temporarily reduced to 10 men whilst Wates changed. A defensive stop gap was required in the ensuing confusion – up stepped Mark Rothwell. This, unequivocally, was in no way a contributing factor to the goal SCP immediately conceded. With more than a hint of offside, a through ball was threaded through for Lagardere’s number 9 to slot home, despite an onrushing Chris Dowell.
Pareto’s second, down to some excellent link-up play between Ash Hunt and Sam Graham, was a peach. Receiving the ball from Hunt, Graham deftly swivelled on the ball, turning with composure on the edge of the 18 yard box to rifle into the bottom corner. After a slightly over-enthusiastic second half tackle, every time Jed Grayston shaped to make a challenge he inspired fear in his opposite number. Jed also took issue with a supposed foul throw – if you have a spare hour I’m sure he’d be happy to talk you through it.
Yet more controversy followed with a rare Lagardere attack. Pareto’s bullish insistence on playing a high line allowed Lagardere’s pacy striker in once more. He calmly stroked the ball into the net for a third, to the vain, but entirely justified, offside cries of all in Pareto colours.
Chance after chance fell Pareto’s way as they piled on the pressure in search of an equaliser. Ash Hunt flashed wide after some good combination play with Amin Tounsi down the right. Josh Miller struck the post – and only a miscommunication between Greg Davis and Hunt in the six yard box prevented a third. Tom Gillespie, Pareto’s solid midfield anchor, had a great opportunity near the death. With options either side, Tom G saw his name up in lights. After releasing a shot that is still rising over the bar as this report is being typed, he instead heard his name angrily all around him. Less Captain Marvel, more Captain Crunch.
It would be remiss not to mention Ali Goodier, a fantastic organiser and official photographer. A big thank you also goes out to Mhairi Hannah and James Hornsby for their (particularly in Mhairi’s case) vocal support.
The final whistle signalled a short walk (hobble) to the Ship Inn and a post-match post-mortem. Whilst Sporting Club Pareto came up short in their long-awaited return to action, there is much promise for the future – a possible clash with Virgin Media is already being touted. Stark improvements were evident after just one game. The future’s bright, the future’s purple.
Although the phrase ‘swashbuckling masterclass’ comes to mind, the author of this piece is prevented from commenting on his own performance out of a sense of modesty.
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